Tag Archives: responsibility

Lack of Commitment

There was a clear lack of commitment when that did not get done, they divorced, the project was late, she resigned, he was downsized, it got out of control, she did not graduate.

It is easy to judge. The truth is we do not have enough information to judge others when it comes to commitment. There are valid reasons to break commitments. There are examples of a lack of commitment also. We rarely have enough information to judge.

Commitment is a challenge to our own personal integrity. Only we can determine the level of commitment we had in our heart when results did not come. Focusing on personal responsibility to commit and to determine if lack of our personal commitment was a factor in an outcome is the only true way to address commitment.

A major issue for commitment is time. Are we only obligated to commit in the beginning? Are we free to cease commitment because of what we see? Are we poised to remove ourselves if we suspect “they” are not committed? Commitment implies a dedication from start to finish, no matter what, barring unacceptable behavior or obstacles. The weakness in our English language implies we commit at the beginning, continue to commit if circumstances warrant, and declare we were commited if results are successful.

We will have discovered on our joyful pursuit of happiness commitment is a delicate balance of doing what it takes, no matter what, and of coming to believe it is time to bow out. Taking this lightly, blaming others and/or circumstances for the reason to bow out can lead to a series of paths of regret.

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Commitment to Individual Responsibility

Those of us living in a democracy are able to exercise freedom of choice. Along with this freedom comes a need to be willing to make responsible choices. When we become no longer willing to accept personal responsibility for our life journey we are creating building blocks for a freedom that has no bounds. This type of freedom does not carry a concern for potential consequences for other individuals, communities, and the country as a whole.

As individuals in a society we have duties that are obvious and clear but are often taken for granted. We have a duty to be the best we can be in the role of:

  • student
  • family member
  • resident of a community
  • citizen
  • member of organizations

We must recognize these to be the highest of responsibilities. We must recognize individual responsibility means we are accountable for our own actions; past, present, and future. At the same time, we must know life brings countless outside forces that limit our options for action. Life is not always fair. Life is difficult.

We will have discovered on our joyful pursuit of happiness freedom of choice is best exercised by making and maintaining a commitment to taking full personal responsibility for our own OneRoad Traveled.

Commitment to Marriage

Divorce rates show how strong the commitment to marriage is consistent with ’til death do us part.’ Are there reasons to divorce? Yes. It is our responsible choice whether the grounds are severe and dangerous behaviors or are the frustrating behaviors of every day life.

Commitment to marriage is not a commitment to erotic attraction ’til death do us part.’ Commitment to marriage is not a commitment to agreement on everything ’til death do us part.’ Commitment to marriage is not a commitment to staying only if our spouse does not change ’til death do us part.’ Commitment to marriage is not a commitment as long as our spouse changes to our satisfaction ’til death do us part.’ Commitment to marriage is not a commitment to avoid conflict ’til death do us part.’

We will have discovered marriage is a commitment to help our spouse grow emotionally and spiritually and a commitment to ourself to grow emotionally and spiritually with our spouse……….’til death do us part’……no matter what.

Good Attitudes

Attitude is our inner thinking, feeling, or disposition about people, places, things, and circumstances. Attitude is one of the crucial fuels for thoughts, actions, behavior, and ultimately, character. We will have discovered having predominately bad attitudes does not lead to a joyful pursuit of happiness.

Life is very difficult. If we depend on our environment to give us good attitudes, we will not succeed. We must strive for a lifetime of hard work developing and growing good attitudes Some of the very best attitudes to pursue are:

  • loving
  • humble
  • forgiving
  • caring
  • respectful
  • helpful
  • patient
  • grateful
  • responsible
  • compassionate
  • peacemaking

We will discover developing good attitudes is a very holistic pursuit. Sometimes, we will find we can simply change our thinking and feelings. Many, many times we will find that approach just does not work. We may need to look at ourselves and our surroundings. Our hearts may tell us to look at what we put into our bodies, our level and type of physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual activity, the nature of our relationships. By staying with it, we will have discovered our ability to discover the best first, second, and next steps on our journey to good attitudes.

It takes perseverance, another great attitude that deserves our focus.

Character Over the Years

Desirable character traits have been considered for thousands of years.

Confucius says “The princely man has three great virtues. He is truly benevolent, and is free from care; he is truly wise and is free from delusions; he is truly brave and is free from fear. Wisdom, benevolence, and courage certainly pass the test of time as solid character traits.

Ben Franklin came up with thirteen! They are temperance, silence, order, resolution, frugality, industry, sincerity, justice, moderation, cleanliness, tranquility, chastity, and humility.

The Six Pillars of Character is a contemporary character education offering for youth. The pillars are caring, citizenship, fairness, respect, responsibility, and trustworthiness. This is offered by Character Counts, a part of the Josephson Institute.

No one can be perfect at all these character traits; however, we must strive to display traits such as the above as much as we can.

We will have discovered during our joyful pursuit of happiness that building our character over time is best accomplished by focusing on a few traits that are most consistent with who we really are.

Another good list is shown in the previous post, Character Traits

Character Traits

Papaw Arthur’s top ten character traits, in alphabetical order,  are:

  • Balance
  • Empathy
  • Faithfulness
  • Humility
  • Integrity
  • Kindness
  • Peace of Mind
  • Perseverance
  • Respectfulness
  • Responsibility

Paths for Life

For the countless choices in life, the truth is there are simply three paths before us at all times:

  • Accept with Peace
  • Bow Out with Grace
  • Change with Responsibility

The paths for our joyful journey are as easy as ABC to describe and as difficult to execute as life itself.