Lack of Commitment

There was a clear lack of commitment when that did not get done, they divorced, the project was late, she resigned, he was downsized, it got out of control, she did not graduate.

It is easy to judge. The truth is we do not have enough information to judge others when it comes to commitment. There are valid reasons to break commitments. There are examples of a lack of commitment also. We rarely have enough information to judge.

Commitment is a challenge to our own personal integrity. Only we can determine the level of commitment we had in our heart when results did not come. Focusing on personal responsibility to commit and to determine if lack of our personal commitment was a factor in an outcome is the only true way to address commitment.

A major issue for commitment is time. Are we only obligated to commit in the beginning? Are we free to cease commitment because of what we see? Are we poised to remove ourselves if we suspect “they” are not committed? Commitment implies a dedication from start to finish, no matter what, barring unacceptable behavior or obstacles. The weakness in our English language implies we commit at the beginning, continue to commit if circumstances warrant, and declare we were commited if results are successful.

We will have discovered on our joyful pursuit of happiness commitment is a delicate balance of doing what it takes, no matter what, and of coming to believe it is time to bow out. Taking this lightly, blaming others and/or circumstances for the reason to bow out can lead to a series of paths of regret.

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Commitment to Individual Responsibility

Those of us living in a democracy are able to exercise freedom of choice. Along with this freedom comes a need to be willing to make responsible choices. When we become no longer willing to accept personal responsibility for our life journey we are creating building blocks for a freedom that has no bounds. This type of freedom does not carry a concern for potential consequences for other individuals, communities, and the country as a whole.

As individuals in a society we have duties that are obvious and clear but are often taken for granted. We have a duty to be the best we can be in the role of:

  • student
  • family member
  • resident of a community
  • citizen
  • member of organizations

We must recognize these to be the highest of responsibilities. We must recognize individual responsibility means we are accountable for our own actions; past, present, and future. At the same time, we must know life brings countless outside forces that limit our options for action. Life is not always fair. Life is difficult.

We will have discovered on our joyful pursuit of happiness freedom of choice is best exercised by making and maintaining a commitment to taking full personal responsibility for our own OneRoad Traveled.

Commitment to Family

A strong sense of commitment is the foundation for a strong, fully-functional family. The commitment of each family member includes:

  • Giving heartfelt appreciation to family members when deserved
  • Spending time together
  • Showing affection
  • Constructively solving problems using compromise, boundaries, and agreements
  • Communicating completely to understanding
  • Managing stress and crises with a focus on learning lessons of life and having faith in the future
  • Developing and honoring a set of family principles
  • Nurturing a “yes” attitude
  • Using internal and external people, tools, and information for addressing the present and planning for the future.

The approach to commitment is best viewed as a commitment to helping each family member to grow physically, intellectually, emotionally, and spiritually; including oneself and the family unit as a whole.

As adults, we will have discovered on our joyful pursuit of happiness the paramount commitment becomes growing emotionally and spiritually and helping all family members to grow emotionally and spiritually, without condition.

Commitment to Marriage

Divorce rates show how strong the commitment to marriage is consistent with ’til death do us part.’ Are there reasons to divorce? Yes. It is our responsible choice whether the grounds are severe and dangerous behaviors or are the frustrating behaviors of every day life.

Commitment to marriage is not a commitment to erotic attraction ’til death do us part.’ Commitment to marriage is not a commitment to agreement on everything ’til death do us part.’ Commitment to marriage is not a commitment to staying only if our spouse does not change ’til death do us part.’ Commitment to marriage is not a commitment as long as our spouse changes to our satisfaction ’til death do us part.’ Commitment to marriage is not a commitment to avoid conflict ’til death do us part.’

We will have discovered marriage is a commitment to help our spouse grow emotionally and spiritually and a commitment to ourself to grow emotionally and spiritually with our spouse……….’til death do us part’……no matter what.

Commitment to Change – Quote

A OneRoad Traveled Roadsign

Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.

                 Margaret Mead

Faith and Commitment

There are multiple definitions of both faith and commitment. One meaning of each follows and are the meanings intended for the discussion:

Commitment – The state of being bound emotionally and/or intellectually to a course of action or to another person or persons.

Faith – Confident belief in the truth, value, or trustworthiness of a person, idea, or thing.

Choices we make can be a single action, repeated actions leading to our behaviors, or a character trait to develop. We make choices just for today, and choices that last weeks, years, perhaps a lifetime. When we do not complete a course of action, turn an idea into reality, stay married, maintain a long-term friendship, keep a promise, or continue a healthy habit; we give reasons specific to the situation.

We humans tend toward being out of balance on this. Many of us tend toward justifying our every choice, action, and behavior. Many of us do the opposite. We tell ourselves we have been mostly wrong in our life with our actions and our relationships.

We will have discovered on our joyful pursuit of happiness, the truth is we either lost our faith or became no longer committed, or both. Sometimes it is the best path to take; sometimes it is not. We must be fine with that. Learning and growing from these experiences and building our integrity is the high road.

Faithful Commitment

Faithful commitment is a fuel to use wisely on our joyful pursuit of happiness. We will have discovered a faithful commitment becomes the foundation on OneRoad Traveled for many other important and desirable traits. These character traits are very difficult to attain without commitment:

  • dedication
  • determination
  • devotion
  • focus
  • resolve
  • self-control
  • self-discipline
  • perseverance

In the end, all the subtle shades of meaning can be combined. Getting a result, arriving at a destination, may very simply require the fuel of faithful commitment to do whatever it takes to get there.